Way too much to say and be proud of....but it was delicious
Knitted so far today:
Nothing as it has been a wild crazy busy day.
I know it's been a while since my last post and I do apologize for the few who do actually keep up. This past month has been only about school. Like...only about school. Project after project and paper after paper. Finals are finally done and I am only working on my internship now. I really thought that I was going to have a nervous breakdown midway through but with the grace of God I've made it through, praise Him!
I have made a big decision recently and I have decided to go back to using hearing aids. I've spent the past few years not using them because frankly, they suck. I really hate the feeling of having plastic shoved in my ear and listening to what sounds like breath on a microphone all day. But that's not the worse part of it all. It's the stigma that kills me. The look that you get from people who see these hooks on the back of your ears or the chunk of plastic stuck inside and they get it...they know. Why does the fact that I am Deaf freak people out so much? Why do I get the automatic assumptions that either I can't communicate intelligently? Or that I am not capable of higher thought? I just get really frustrated with the whole backwards way it is. We're supposed to be trying to contribute to society but then we're getting the shaft in the way people assume.
Now I have to go through the whole stupid process of getting new hearing aids so that I can function in this world that has no room for a Deaf person like me and am still expected to act like a hearing person, speak like a hearing person even though I am NOT a hearing person.
On a happier note, I do finish my Master's program next semester. It's been made official, the classes I have now are all I need to finish. I just have to get through Spring semester and pass the classes I've registered for and I am home free. How cool is that? All these years of work culminating to this...I couldn't be happier.
Now as this year comes to a close, I am happy to say I'm glad I went through all the crap I did. I learned not to take anything for granted, don't have such low standards for myself, and to always want the best. It's very hard to want the best when you have to start accepting that you are worthy of the best. So thank you for listening to my rants these past months and for listening in the future.
Ohh by the way! December 15th I turn 28 so keep me in your prayers please as I battle another year with yarn and life!
What I've made since the last time:
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| Baby blanket for my Behavioral Studies teacher. She was having her first son. Her first two girls are absolute dolls! |
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| This hat was actually done but I never got a picture of it before I gave it to my communication facilitator. She's one awesome lady and I love her to bits. She helps me so much. |
Ugh, I wish you luck with the process of choosing new hearing aids. Literally EVERY brochure will say that theirs is the best for the exact same reasons.
ReplyDeleteI obviously don't know what brand of hearing aids you last had, and I know that they tend to spazz out more when correcting for a higher level of loss (the lovely squeeling of feedback...), but if you got yours a long time ago, you might be surprised at the quality of the newer hearing aids out there.
I got new ones after 5+ years and it was insane. I got the Oticon Agils. The tubes that connect from the ear mold to the main piece are super tiny. I don't really care about them being seen, but it's definitely a plus. Even my Mom asked one day if I wasn't wearing them and she wears them too. (But I think that was because I switched from ear molds to the domes, which are easier to hear with, and give you more of a natural sound.) And you can get different colors for the main piece to match your hair and/or skin.
Have you ever used a loop device? Like something that transmits sound to your hearing aid from an mp3 player or phone - kinda like telecoil for the phone, and some require that setting. Now THAT will get you weird looks. "I'm going to put on something that looks like a necklace to play music that no one else can hear." Haha. I had one that was like a hook over your ear, and the cord was coiled, so it made me look like a secret service agent. =P
I intended this to be a short comment, but I guess I'm too passionate about the subject for that to be possible. Sorry if this is weird, also, to share all this to a stranger. I just have no shame about my hearing loss (it does piss me off, though, especially when I can't hear on the phone, and even people who have known me for years will seem pissed when I'm struggling and have them repeat themselves 2048294 times, haha) and wanted to help out if I could.
One last thing: I don't want to imply that I'm encouraging you to wear hearing aids when you don't want to. I'm all for people not using them if they don't want to. But I just wanted to give you my two cents about how important it is to get hearing aids that work best for you. (I love mine, but my mom has almost exactly the same ones and hates them. She also never goes in to get adjustments, though.)
Okay, I'll cut myself off here. ;]